Menopause advice often concentrates on getting through the hot flushes.
But what happens afterwards?
For many women, one of the most important questions is rarely discussed openly:
What happens to our intimate relationship?
Changes in desire, lubrication and vaginal comfort can all affect sex after menopause.
But intimacy does not have to disappear.
Start by removing pressure
If every affectionate touch feels as though it must lead to intercourse, intimacy can become stressful.
Take the objective away.
Spend time touching, talking, massaging or simply being physically close without requiring anything else to happen.
That can allow affection to become enjoyable again rather than another task.
Comfort comes first
Dryness and tissue changes may make penetration uncomfortable.
Lubricants or vaginal moisturisers can help many women.
More time for arousal may also be needed.
If pain continues, seek medical advice rather than repeatedly trying to push through it.
Talk to each other
Your partner cannot know exactly how your body feels unless you explain it.
Equally, a partner may be worried about causing pain or may interpret reduced desire as rejection.
A conversation can remove a surprising amount of anxiety.
Rediscover rather than recreate
Trying to reproduce your sex life from twenty or thirty years ago may not be particularly useful.
Bodies change.
Relationships change.
What matters is finding what is comfortable, enjoyable and meaningful now.
That may include:
massage
longer periods of touch
lubricants
different sexual activities
aids or devices
simply more time